Tough things to get used to.

[Hypiereon]

What are some of the toughest things to get used to when you go abroad? Two of the most obvious seems to be language and food, but is there anything else that stands out as being really tough to handle from your part of the world?

I caught this thread from another website and thought this might be good to start here. I also thought of starting it in the "Teaching and Living in China Forum" until I realized there are probably some unique difficulties for the different countries. While language and food seem to be universal problems to get used to, I wasn't so sure about any of ther others I might add.

For instance, the first time you walk into a Chinese bathroom and really have to make "An Act of Congress" (to steal a line from Dave Barry) only to realize the deposit station is a round hole in the floor, and the smell is something you can actually feel seeping into your skin, is all just too much the first time.

I'm pretty average in size for an American, but having to squat over the hole in the floor hoping my aim was just right was most uncomfortable. I didn't want to get anything on my shoe or "place" something in a spot where I might step in it on the way out. Then, after about two minutes I started to get this "buzzing" in my legs as the circulation was slowly being cut off. I had to pull myself up to standing position again just to get the blood flowing through my thighs so I could walk out without looking too awkward. Add to this that I was trying to hold my breath from the utter stench and then, when I finally did breathe I was dry-heaving from the smell - (smell being a certain portion of taste I shall leave you now with your imagination) - I knew this was beyond any doubt a foreign country.

It's always tough. It's STILL tough. I've never "become used to it" and will try to anticipate my needs to fall in line with places I know have western "accommodations." In all, a pretty terrible surprise I actually get a kick out of watching other less-informed foreigners walk blindly into. I do try to stay on hand for when the cry of "Where's the toilet paper?!" comes - (can't leave a guy totally helpless like that!). Upon making a trip back to the US, my wife and I both laughed about still carrying that extra toilet paper around with us everywhere we went.

[gfell]

Originally Posted by Hypiereon

only to realize the deposit station is a round hole in the floor, and the smell is something you can actually feel seeping into your skin, is all just too much the first time.

Same problem here in Japan. However, nowadays, it's common to have both western and Japanese toilets wherever you go. Funny thing though, the Japanese tend to prefer the western toilets too. They are the first ones to be used in train stations etc.

Interesting insignts to toilets in China. I know how you feel with legs going numb by squatting over a hole. And you have to be careful your pants don't touch the ground otherwise you never know what filth would stick to them. Trick is to push your full length of pants up under your knees.

Have you come across toilets without doors? Have heard of these type of toilets also in China.

[Hypiereon]

Actually that was one of the things I didn't mention on purpose - didn't want to ruin the surprise. But since the "bag is out of the cat" on it, what makes the whole thing even more embarassing is people staring!! Cripes!!! The walls on the very first one I ever used in public were only waist high, and only by being in "the squatted position" would you have any sense of privacy - lacking though it was.

You almost wanna come of with a "Take a picture it'll last longer!" remark, but who in their right mind would ever think to say such a thing about such a thing?

Worst first experience I'd ever heard of comes from my wife who tells me in the women's bathroom you basically just sit across from each other and the only thing to look at except the floor is the person across from you. I will not go into the details my wife gave about the view, but suffice it to say she vowed never to go back again.

Another good point about the pants. It took me several seconds to figure out that "around the ankles" would only make them more of a target. Gathering them up is the only way to write that "Act of Congress" off to where it belongs.

[Antonio]

Maybe this can shed more light on loos in China. Shows a picture of what you can expect.

[harold h]

Well, they probably think strange of some of our toilets. Ever been to Planet Hollywood in Sydney? Was there once, and there was a guy working in the toilet. He would offer cologne, special soap and hand towels for you to use. Of course, you didn't have to pay, but he would only make money from tips.

He had so much pride and joy in this shit hole.... makes you wonder at times.

[Hypiereon]

Talk about them thinking our toilets are strange, myself and more than one foreigner have actually noticed shoe prints on the toilet seats at McDonalds. It's as if some Chinese person from the countryside walked into the place, saw the comode for the first time in their lives and thought, "Now what in hell is THAT?!"

Actually, that "Loos in China" picture is what you can expect at most of the middle/high schools in China - especially in the rural areas. It's a common "trench" that has been "divided" into stalls. You ride sideways over it, but the picture is accurate enough. Only difference in some of them is that some of them have tiles to cover that bare concrete. The toughest part about these types is that they can accumulate quite a "collection" in the trench even if the flush mechanism is working properly. The only real way to get the trench clean is to either dig it out or burn it out - though I'm afraid neither solution would actually make the place any cleaner.

Most of the univeristy toilets and restaurant toilets basically look like someone stole the "throne" and left a small basin in it's place. The basin is usually 4 - 6 inches deeper than the floor (just an estimate - never felt motivated to take an actual measurement of the thing) and about 1 1/2 feet in length - the hole is at one end of the basin, but for the life of me I can't figure out which way you're supposed to face! Do you back in like a western toilet or for a little added privcay do you face the wall? If it's a westerner doing the westerner thing the wrong way, it's funny to them - if it's a westerner apparently confused by the whole contraption and is stupidly facing a wall, then that's going to be funny to them, too. You have to understand that there's no real way to tell about this sort of thing because some of them have the little hole nearer the wall, some of them have the little hole nearer the door opening.
(If anyone can shed any light on this particular problem, please - don't!)

I just figure that if someone wants to take a gander he can take in a "full moon" 'cause I don't intend to sit there and pose with a stupid grin on my face if someone happens to look my way. I also figure its safer 'cause if I totally lose all feeling in my legs and can't move, I can at least reach over and grab the plumbing that's sticking out of the wall to hoist myself back out of "squat!"

The way I see it, if I'm working on an "Act of Congress" in the wrong end of the basin, then in my mind it only makes a more apt anaolgy to the whole process to begin with. The worst time ever to experience this comedic-tradgedy though has to be in the winter when that "cold, raw" smell settles like ice in the air and doesn't move. It's gut wrenching just to walk into the place, and no matter how many times you wash your hands afterward you still feel like the creepy-crawlies have jumped on board and are all over you making you feel dirtier for having been at all.

Foreigner I overheard at a restaurant once claimed to have dropped his passport down the drain once (it was in his pants pocket and slipped out) and just right then and there went and told the manager of the restaurant he'd been robbed while using the bathroom and that the theif got his wallet and passport. He said there was no way he was going fishing for it, nor would he have wanted it back in any case.

Even if it's just a tall tale, if it ever happened to me I now know exactly what I'd do.

[Hypiereon]

Another thing that was actually hard to get used to, in China anyway, is all the smiling. They smile when they get in trouble, smile when they stab you in the back, smile when something goes wrong, smile when they lose face, smile when you catch them with their hand in your pocket, and on and on it goes.

I like smiles as I do tend to sport one more often then not, but there are situations where it just does not really seem very appropriate. All their smiling was hard for me to get used to, but I find now that it is just a cultural thing, and not something they do on purpose to hack you off. It's actually a pretty nice way to try to diffuse a situation when one person is angry and has every right to be.

Cheating on tests is fairly common in China, so I try to keep a close eye and set behavioral boundaries in my room to limit even the possibility, but when it happens, I do call them on it. When all they did was stand there and smile, I used to think it was just a joke to them, when in fact they had lost face for being caught and were truly embarassed by the situation. It was difficult to make this distinction and change in my western mind, but when I started noting it in other situations between Chinese I quickly started to catch on to the whole thing.

A woman walked blindly in front of a bicycle going the wrong way. She was watching for bicycle traffic from the left (where it was supposed to be coming from) and never even glanced to the right. The woman on the bicycle coming from the wrong direction was trying to avoid going all the way around the intersection and in a freak coincidence, they both met "Head On" to the surprise of both of them. They both yelled a little, smiled a lot, and were visibly angry and shaken, yet smiling. It was rather strange to watch, but it did give me a better idea of how the whole "smile" thing fits in with their culture.

Maybe this is something you just have to experience to really understand, but when you do get those fake smiles the first few times, it will really stirke you as odd. Just start paying attention more and you'll actually start to see them everywhere.