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Hypiereon · Sat 28-Jan-06, 02:03 PM

Another thing that was actually hard to get used to, in China anyway, is all the smiling. They smile when they get in trouble, smile when they stab you in the back, smile when something goes wrong, smile when they lose face, smile when you catch them with their hand in your pocket, and on and on it goes.

I like smiles as I do tend to sport one more often then not, but there are situations where it just does not really seem very appropriate. All their smiling was hard for me to get used to, but I find now that it is just a cultural thing, and not something they do on purpose to hack you off. It's actually a pretty nice way to try to diffuse a situation when one person is angry and has every right to be.

Cheating on tests is fairly common in China, so I try to keep a close eye and set behavioral boundaries in my room to limit even the possibility, but when it happens, I do call them on it. When all they did was stand there and smile, I used to think it was just a joke to them, when in fact they had lost face for being caught and were truly embarassed by the situation. It was difficult to make this distinction and change in my western mind, but when I started noting it in other situations between Chinese I quickly started to catch on to the whole thing.

A woman walked blindly in front of a bicycle going the wrong way. She was watching for bicycle traffic from the left (where it was supposed to be coming from) and never even glanced to the right. The woman on the bicycle coming from the wrong direction was trying to avoid going all the way around the intersection and in a freak coincidence, they both met "Head On" to the surprise of both of them. They both yelled a little, smiled a lot, and were visibly angry and shaken, yet smiling. It was rather strange to watch, but it did give me a better idea of how the whole "smile" thing fits in with their culture.

Maybe this is something you just have to experience to really understand, but when you do get those fake smiles the first few times, it will really stirke you as odd. Just start paying attention more and you'll actually start to see them everywhere.

Sat 28-Jan-06, 02:03 PM	#7 (permalink)
Hypiereon ESL Addict Join Date: Aug 2005 Nationality: American Occupation: General Manager www.MilestoneGC.com Location: Posts: 140	Another thing . . . Another thing that was actually hard to get used to, in China anyway, is all the smiling. They smile when they get in trouble, smile when they stab you in the back, smile when something goes wrong, smile when they lose face, smile when you catch them with their hand in your pocket, and on and on it goes. I like smiles as I do tend to sport one more often then not, but there are situations where it just does not really seem very appropriate. All their smiling was hard for me to get used to, but I find now that it is just a cultural thing, and not something they do on purpose to hack you off. It's actually a pretty nice way to try to diffuse a situation when one person is angry and has every right to be. Cheating on tests is fairly common in China, so I try to keep a close eye and set behavioral boundaries in my room to limit even the possibility, but when it happens, I do call them on it. When all they did was stand there and smile, I used to think it was just a joke to them, when in fact they had lost face for being caught and were truly embarassed by the situation. It was difficult to make this distinction and change in my western mind, but when I started noting it in other situations between Chinese I quickly started to catch on to the whole thing. A woman walked blindly in front of a bicycle going the wrong way. She was watching for bicycle traffic from the left (where it was supposed to be coming from) and never even glanced to the right. The woman on the bicycle coming from the wrong direction was trying to avoid going all the way around the intersection and in a freak coincidence, they both met "Head On" to the surprise of both of them. They both yelled a little, smiled a lot, and were visibly angry and shaken, yet smiling. It was rather strange to watch, but it did give me a better idea of how the whole "smile" thing fits in with their culture. Maybe this is something you just have to experience to really understand, but when you do get those fake smiles the first few times, it will really stirke you as odd. Just start paying attention more and you'll actually start to see them everywhere. __________________ Hypiereon's Maxim: "The best teacher cannot help a student who absolutely refuses to learn; the worst teacher cannot refuse the one who will not be denied."